In this world created by divine power, if someone is really difficult to understand than it is a human being. It is difficult to identify or understand a human being in real sense by his actions because even for the same thing his reaction or decision is quite different and opposite to each other. The so-called religious people who worship RADHA-Krishna all their lives cannot understand or accept the love of their own children. I think that those who worship RADHA-Krishna may not know why they worship RADHA-Krishna. Why RADHA-Krishna is adorable and what life lesion they are giving? Only in terms of religious rituals, without any real deep understanding, one worships RADHA-Krishna as God for life but cannot achieve life-realization in a lifetime.
Like me, all of you must have experience that the family or society believing in RADHA-Krishna or worshiper of RADHA-Krishna cannot accept the children fall in love with someone. Sometimes they become very violent, even slap in anger, raise objections, show excessive hatred and dislike, tried to break their love successfully or unsuccessfully. If they succeed in such endeavors, enjoys nurturing his ego that he has done something excellent, and if they fails than breaks off relations with their own children only as a punishment for love. In both cases the victory is not of love because love is nothing but deep lovely understanding and concern that most of us do not have.
The society that worships RADHA-Krishna has to understand that there is no special reason for worshiping RADHA-Krishna except the mutual love of both towards each other with infinite, pure, selfless and deep understanding. Moreover, don’t ever think that love is just attachment or infatuation because love has eternal bliss while attachment has endless pain. In attachment there is a constant desire and expectation to get something while in love there is a constant feeling of being happy by giving. When love becomes so deep, selfless and supernatural it becomes a symbol of worship or devotion. But identifying love is not easy for everyone. To understand divine love or to see it properly, divine eyes are required. In the selfish and deceitful age we live in, the word love seems like a curse because in the name of love we only exploit each other. As long as our desire-expectation is satisfied by the lover, we remain interested in it. But if a lover wants to indulge in his own paradise, the burden of forced confinement is imposed on him. Where love not only destroys but also the entire existence of the person is endangered.
In a society that worships RADHA-Krishna, parents or elders cannot accept the love of children instinctively as they have pre-determined standards of love by which they determine the happiness of their children. If the child loves according to those standards, it becomes valid or acceptable otherwise it is rejected with a passion. For example, if a son or daughter falls in love with a multimillionaire, beautiful, well-respected family, a high caste or a cultured person and chooses him / her as his / her spouse, the family will gladly accept. Otherwise, they reject the love of their children and force their marriage according to their own pre-determined standards. I have no intention of saying that it is in no way appropriate for parents to reject love of their offspring with an unworthy character. So please do not misunderstood me, it is also true that today’s youth do not have sense of selection or sense of identifying right or wrong. It is natural to create problems due to lack of true identification of love and right knowledge. Only physical attraction is not love and when people influence by it obviously such love lasts regretful a lifetime. Blame it on each other’s love throughout the life. Somewhere behind this the elders and the society are responsible because they have not taught the children to recognize true love. My personal opinion is that we do not consider love or affection necessary for marriage. If the condition of love or marriage is wealth, decency, prestige, beauty, status, caste etc., then it literally means that love is not a necessary condition for marriage or relationship in society. There is only a desire for the means of happiness and the attainment of prestige in the society and perhaps that is why in today’s society a person seems very restless, miserable with all the material pleasures. Because a loving life is the key to true happiness, that actually we all know but in the name of tradition and prestige we forget everything. Deliberately we kicked out love from our life and then find it in the midst of complete material happiness for the rest of our lives. We long for love and regret not having love. But how can we regret for love because we ourselves have so sensibly abandoned it for the sake of material happiness?
Please do not misunderstand through this article that I am openly in favor of love marriage because I am actually not in favor of marriage if it does without sensibility and true understanding. In no way can it be appropriate to have offspring fall in love with an unworthy character, but the criteria for judging a character right or wrong may not be wealth, beauty, social status or prestige. Because the society that worships RADHA-Krishna does not have any resemblance in terms of age, caste, wealth, beauty. RADHA-Krishna’s relationship is not appropriate according to any factors or norms determined by society. Because RADHA-Krishna is neither a suitable pair in terms of age nor is there any matching in His beauty. There is no resemblance even in terms of wealth, one is king and the other is average. Even in age, inequality is seen like female elder and male younger. In terms of beauty also one brunette and other is fair. Even though it is not acceptable according to the pre-determined factors or norms of the society, the worship of RADHA-Krishna has been going on for ages. If such a deep understanding and noble spirit is maintained towards our children, then perhaps suffering can be eliminated from life. But the greatest problem of the society is that we can never have such a noble spirit towards the children.
I think at-least the society and families who worship the RADHA-Krishna should nurture their children with due respect and acceptance of love rather than many worldly factors and norms like wealth, status, religion, clan, beauty because the worship of anything cannot be without understanding. Otherwise it will only be monotonous action. Those people are really special and blessed who worship RADHA-Krishna for their pure love. But that worship can never be result-oriented if it is just a mechanical action without a noble spirit. In fact, it is not that we do not accept love at all, but if that love is subject to the standards we have determined (race, religion, status, wealth, beauty, nobility, etc.). But if that love is not subject to or suited to such worldly standards, then that love is not valid for us. This means that there are more such pre-determined norms and factors important than love in our lives. From the very beginning of life, when we know that we have taught all the wrong standards to our children knowingly or unknowingly, it is natural that the children will be attracted only by such standards which we have determine and taught them and they obviously consider it as love. Moreover, it is well known fact that person will not be happy after being attracted by such materialistic standards, then at last obviously youth will blame only love when fails in relation because man is a social animal and his basic energy is affection, love and warmth. But we have never made our children aware of that energy so that they live in search of such love energy for the rest of their lives based on the factors we have taught them but love has nothing to do with such pre-determined norms or standards. So that our children can never find true love energy and search for something like lifelong love. When they fail, they reinforce the belief that there is no such thing as love in society and that it continues to spread hatred and negativity. Through which he himself can never breathe a sigh of relief but also spreads the wrong message to the people connected with him and others around him. Under the influence of it many others affected and the life energy is deprived of getting the same love. Pure and divine energy like love must be identified and understood in its true form. Giving the same understanding to the children is also essential. If such true loving sacraments are not inculcated in the offspring from childhood, they will ruin life by understanding vain attraction as love and will be deprived of making life meaningful by gaining divine energy through the attainment of true love.
Modern man is advancing so high in the sky of egoistic ambition that the facility of approaching love is diminishing. There is a love temple in VRINDAVANA where RADHA’s feet are in Krishna’s lap. Can we imitate like this? Will we be able to know and accept that depth of love? because the male ego can never accept it. But ego has no place in love. The ego always thinks that what will be gained by it? Ego always has purpose while love has no purpose. The SADHANA of life is the only true DHARMA SADHANA or love SADHANA it can only be full of love. The basis of life is love that we may have forgotten. How is it possible that by removing the basic pillar, we are trying to sustain life on the pillar of false parameters such as wealth, caste, religion etc? How can we make life happy with this faulty understanding?
Shilpa shah, director in-charge HKBBA College
